Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Would I do the same?
My friend made an interesting hypothesis a while ago- she said that you see people doing things for the same reason you would do them. This caused me to reflect and I felt a little ashamed. When you are irritated with someone because you think they've snubbed you or you feel like they went out of their way to be unkind- does it mean that you would do the same to someone? I guess the Savior knows why we all of us do what we do, he understands human nature perfectly but he's not like that at all. What do you think?
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I suppose I could agree that oftentimes I'm irritated at people for doing something I would do under similar circumstances. Like driving a little crazy cause you're looking at a map and unsure of where you're going, or acting a little snappy cause you've had a long day. But not always. You gave the example of someone purposefully being unkind; I don't think everyone's like that. For example, I don't think YOU you would act that way to anyone, so I'd have to disagree with your friend if they are saying that any behavior you see in another is something you would do yourself.
ReplyDeleteI guess the important thing to try and understand is that sometimes people are not acting the way we are assuming they are. ARE they really snubbing me? Were they really unkind on purpose? Maybe not. I'm sure we've all been shocked when someone else said that we hurt their feelings in some way we were completely unaware of.
And yes, I agree that most of the time we have to leave it in the Savior's hands to judge true intentions. I know I sure hope other people do that for me.
Great post!
For most people, it is probably true a some of the time, but I don't think it is necessarily the case.
ReplyDeleteAnd sometimes I imagine someone is doing something for a reason I would do it, when, in fact he/she is not. It's all me and none of them.
Also, I think there is a difference between noticing someone's behavior and feeling a particular negative way in response. For example, if I am bothered by someone's pride, I probably have pride myself--that's why it bothers me.
Maybe one reason the Savior can understand human nature without sharing our faults is because of his perfect love.
I think that's an interesting hypothesis. It doesn't necessarily mean that you would do something unkind on purpose. If someone cuts you off in traffic and you think "what a jerk! I bet they did that on purpose! those ______(insert one of the 50 states here) drivers!!" then maybe you are the kind of person who might cut someone else off on purpose. But if you see that car and think "wow, that person must have been in a hurry. I hope they're ok" (I know, it's hard to think like that when someone has been unfair!!)maybe that means that would be the reason YOU might cut someone off. If you always give people the benefit of the doubt, then you will be worthy of receiving the benefit of the doubt.... I don't know. I have certainly been guilty of the first option in the above scenario!!!
ReplyDeleteIn another situation, I told a person "I don't think we should be so competitive about this issue" and they seemed confused and said something like "I haven't felt like we've been competitive about this at all! I felt like you were encouraging me!" I felt sheepish.
I think we tend to see the world only through our own two eyes; namely, if we are naive or honest, we might think that everyone around us is doing things for genuine, honest reasons. By the same token, if we are liars, we might suspect that everyone around us is always lying to us, and not be able to trust people. Either one could get you into trouble.
Finally, the Savior knows what our true motivations actually are! So that doesn't mean that he would be unkind, but it does mean that He knows why WE are being unkind. Not only does He know the innermost thoughts of our hearts-- He also suffered all of the injustices and persecutions that we could ever suffer, so He knows EXACTLY how we feel. That's why He is such a fair judge.
And why WE can't be the judge of anyone! We don't know why they act the way they do. We haven't walked in their shoes. I need to remember that :) Great post to think about!
I have wondered that about myself... maybe the reason I'm so worried about what others think about me is because I'm judgmental myself? Maybe I wouldn't worry at all, if I didn't have some of it in me, too?
ReplyDeleteIt's a good question.